OK, so it's no secret that collectively, millennials have a hard time functioning in the real world and are completely broke from crippling student debt and $12 avocado toast. Older generations love to laugh at us and joke that we'll never be able to afford to buy houses. All of my money goes to rent -- what do you expect?
As a cruel reminder of our struggling existence, someone at Hasbro thought it would be funny to create a Monopoly for Millennials game highlighting all of our mishaps. I, for one, feel very attacked.
"Forget real estate. You can't afford it anyway," the tagline of Monopoly for Millennials so touchingly reads. Rather than buying houses and properties in this game, players will buy "experiences" like going to a farmers' market or attending a music festival. Gone are the days of paying an insane rent price (well, by game standards, anyway) to sit on Park Place. Now, you'll simply "visit" your friends, gain experience points and only collect some cash when another player visits a destination that you discovered first. Pics or it didn't happen, am I right?
The company went so far as to trade Monopoly's railroad spaces for bike shares and exchange the classic game tokens for more...millennial tokens, including a camera, an emoji and a hashtag. This is all fine and dandy, until we find out that the options for Chance and Community Chest cards include $0 internships (the bane of everyone's existence) and a "Get Into Jail Free" card. Because jail is the only place you can go and not lose money.
"This board game is a great way to bring a fun and relaxed vibe to a party or casual get-together," the game's description boasts. IDK about you guys, but considering whoever has the most debt gets to roll first, this doesn't exactly sound like the "relaxed vibe" I typically look for at parties. Then again, I'm a millennial -- what do I know?
Find Monopoly for Millennials on Amazon or in Walmart stores.