Morning
Finally. Thanksgiving.
I can already smell the turkey roasting. It’s going to be a good day.
OK, but what am I going to wear?
Sure, I’ll be sitting in my living room literally all day, but I should probably wear my new heels.
Hoop earrings? Hoop earrings.
Oh, sh*t. These were cousin Susan’s hoop earrings I “borrowed” last Thanksgiving.
...Maybe she won’t notice.
Pre-Dinner
Hellloooo, appetizers!
Crostini, check. Canapés, check. Bread, check.
...Where’s the brie?
You’re kidding. No one brought brie?!
This family doesn’t understand me.
If Susan stares at my earrings one more time…
Dinner
I’m about to go in.
Grandma saved me a drumstick?! I knew I was the favorite.
OK, these mashed potatoes are not nearly chunky enough. These people are amateurs.
No thank you, cranberry sauce. Keep it movin’.
I know I didn’t just see Uncle Jimmy sneak an extra dinner roll.
There are only so many, James.
Am I getting full?
No way.
Getting full is for wimps.
Round two, here I come.
After Dinner
Round two. Was a huge mistake.
Can’t move. Can’t Speak.
Don’t look at me, Aunt Alice.
I shouldn’t be seen like this.
Why did I wear pants with a button?
How stupid could I be.
Should I go change? Is that tacky?
Screw it, it’s my house! I will find the sweatpants!
OMG, did I have too much wine?
My head is pounding.
I definitely had too much wine.
Football cannot be that serious. Everyone stop yelling.
Dessert? Please don’t.
It’s too much.
Absolutely no way I’m having another bite of anything in the next 48 hours.
…
…
…
Is that apple pie?